A FINE ROMANCE
Dorothy Fields/Jerome Kern

A fine romance with no kisses,
A fine romance, my friend, this is,
We should be like a couple of hot tomatoes,
But you're as cold as yesterday's mashed po-tah-toes.

A fine romance, you won't nestle,
A fine romance, you won't even wrestle,
You've never mussed the crease in my blue serge pants,
You never take a chance, this is a fine romance.

A fine romance, my good fellow,
You take romance, I'll take jello,
You're calmer than the seals in the Arctic Ocean,
At least they flap their fins to express emotion.

A fine romance, my dear Duchess,
Two old fogies, we really need crutches,
You're just as hard to land as the Ile de France!
I haven't got a chance, this is a fine romance.

A fine romance, my good woman,
My strong, aged-in-the-wood woman,
You never give those orchids I send a glance,
They're just like cactus plants,
This is a fine romance.

-oo0oo-